Things you learn from MSN randomness

[Cissnei]

00. Convos between Roleplayers will never be sane. NEVER.

01. Two out of three Turks are Bisexual.

02. The basement is a scary, scary place of Furry love.

03. Cissnei's the evil type of redhead.

04. Tseng will always have his revenge.

05. Reno is in fact, Gullible when drunk.

06. Insest is Winsest.

07. Horny Kadaj will result in broken beds.

08. And desks

09. ... And windows? (How the hell...)

10. Tseng can and will blackmail you. End of Story.

11. Everybody Hates Hojo.

12. Loz doesn't get enough love.

13. Yes, the Cat's name is Mother.

14. Cloud will always be Emo.

15. There is always bacon in the mindsoap. Always.

Add more. I dare you.

>_> xD

[Kadaj]

16. The good stuff is always in the best hiding places.

17. You never find the best hiding places.

18. Yazoo is in fact a milkshake.

19. His flavour remains a mystery.

20. Alcohol makes everyone look like womennnn~

21. Cissnei’s real name is NOT Florence.

22. Or Gertrude.

23. Or Butch.

24. It’s against company policy to go easy on newbies.

25. Neko Kadaj causes nosebleeds.

26. Do not try to tickle Rufus. Ever.

27. Reno is a biter.

28. Clones support Public Sex

29. Tseng is going to be a daddy.

30. …Not.

31. It’s a Lemo, not a lemon.

32. Reno only makes pencils disappear on the job.

33. Gabriel is scarred for life.

34. It is easy to handcuff clones when they are asleep.

35. They will kill you for it later.

[Cissnei]

36. Rufus is referred to as either Shacho or the Shinra Brat out of Earshot.

37. Cissnei will never get her Costa Del Sol vacation.

38. You might wanna think twice when gnawing the couch.

39. Especially after Kadaj and Yazoo have been on it.

40. Gag pairings of Clones should never be mentioned aloud in front of said Clones.

41. Reno apparently was Killed in Action by Rufus.

42. Reno wasn't trying to Seduce him, honest.

43. Just sleep with him.

44. But if he wanted it, Rufus would just demand it.

45. Tseng still wants his pink Post-It's back.

46. Hellfire is nothing compared to a woman's wrath.

47. Reno totally wussed out of dating that chick on the 31st floor.

48. Tseng always has Photographs.

49. As does Yazoo.

50. But they're both Holding out on us. Bastards.

[Kadaj]

51. Everyone lost the Game.

[Yazoo]

52. GODDAMNIT.

[Cissnei]

53. FOODSEX LOL

54. Handcuffs are Kinky.

55. And Cissnei's totally not thinking about kinky bondage sex.

56. Estrogen is the most Dangerous chemical ever found ever.

57. Mixing Light Yamigi with the Turks will not end well.

58. Especially when Cissnei is in Psycho! mode.

59. When in doubt, throw the cat out the window.

60. It's not the fist time Yazoo's had Carpetburn.

61. Gabriel's lighter will never be found.

62. RAEP PREVENTION MAN cannot be called when the raep is actually wanted.

63. Yes, Tseng is a ninja.

64. Wutaians are like Spartans, only without the cool battlecry.

65. Al fresco sex, anyone?

[Genesis]

66. Genesis is a Catboy.

67. The Basement Door is actually alive and feels pain.

68. Cloud can fuse himself with Sephiroth sword and still poof like a ninja.

69. Cloud is NOT a ninja.

70. Marluxia iz in ur gardenz, raepin' ur plantz.

[Kadaj]

((*way too tired to continues this, but does it anyway*))


71. Certain RPers are liable to pass out without warning.

72. Yazoo got no sleep last night.

73. Not for that reason, you perverts.

74. No, Zexion would not like a book to stand on so he can call you that to your face.

75. Tseng is somehow a master at escaping from handcuffs.

76. When there’s no couch, use the floor.

77. Horny Kadaj will result in broken floors.

78. Tseng always has copies elsewhere.

79. During a game of strip poker, Luxord will be the only person with all his clothes still on.

80. Yes, he cheats.

81. Nobody will believe Sexual Harassment claims made against Tseng.

82. It is possible to intentionally set someone’s tie on fire in a casual manner.

83. L cannot shoot the cat as he cannot hold the gun properly.

84. Just where -did- he stash the gun he offered Light, anyway?

85. It’s not raep, it’s surprise buttseckz.

86. Never touch Cissnei’s personal belongings. Unless you like pain.

87. Turks are family.

88. And a little dysfunctional.

89. Sephiroth has a REALLY big sword.

90. You leave Tseng’s Turks alone, or you get a bullet in your brain.

91. Collars suit Yazoo.

92. He knows it.

93. Sephiroth doesn’t spike his clone’s lunches with crack… honest.

94. Just because Cloud wears a dress doesn’t make him your mother.

95. The only fanservice here is cloneservice.

96. Paedophiles are everywhere.

97. If Kadaj gave a shit who was perving on him, he wouldn’t do it in the middle of a room full of people.

98. The only time three isn't a crowd is if the third is Loz.

99. Talking to Zexion makes you want to slit your wrists like he does every night before crying himself to sleep.

100. Zexion is not an emo.

[Yazoo]

101. Know how much pressure it takes to break a bone, Mr. Genius?

102. Who -Hasn't- Been blackmailed?

103. Unstable Cissnei is like, 18 times worse that PMSing Cissnei.

104. Yazoo will always reappear unruffled.

105. When life gives you lemons, trade them for yaoi.

106. Kira needs a real job.

107. Tseng knows better than to burn the couch.

108. Handcuffing Tseng to L will result in a pissy Cissnei.

109. Handcuffing Kadaj to L will result in a 3-Second warning. Then you die.

110. Handcuffing Cissnei to L will result in Tseng threatening to cap you.

111. Handcuffing L to the door will result in Dramatic Irony.

112. Light can raid a door. Don't ask how.

113. Kadaj has a one track mind.

114. Especially when it comes to Yazoo.

115. Asking 'Where's Loz?' Will result in him barreling through the door a moment later.

[Kadaj]

116. Cissnei still wants to kill Light.

117. L still wants to raep him.

118. Yazoo still doesn't care.

119. Gabriel still can't find his fucking lighter.

120. Yazoo has no say in anything to do with himself.

121. Kadaj really does look good in girl's clothes.

122. He'll kill you if you say so, though.

123. Loz still hasn't managed to catch Vincent the pizza-thief.

124. You talk to Turks with respect, or they'll beat respect into you.

125. Gabriel with nicotine cravings is almost as scary as PMSing Cissnei.

126. Tseng and Cissnei just need to make out already.

127. L thinks that Kadaj is insecure.

128. No shit, Sherlock.

129. It's best not to ask where all these random people come from.

130. "You see, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much..."

[Aerith]

131.Cisseni is a whore

132.A whole lot of closet sex going on

133.Kadaj has a fetish for pizza

134.Aerith never knew Tseng had a thing for her

[Cissnei]

135. The doors in the house will always be abused.

136. Bad things happen when Kadaj goes missing.

137. Gabe feels the need to repeat himself

138. Soba is currently Hidden in one of Tseng's hiding spots.

139. Nero wants his Brother

140. L tastes like Chicken

141. Mother the cat is the source of many, many fights.

142. Tseng thinks lots of things are stoned.

143. It's not wise to provoke Kadaj.

144. It's just fun.

145. Kadaj often resembles a large, angry cat.

146. Yazoo's Gun only shoots Buttons.

147. Light "lost" the game L's whipped cream

148. When Mother get's stuck in the attic, she becomes Ceiling cat.

149. RAEP PREVENTION MAN: IT'S NOT ALLOWED IF HE DOESN'T WANT IT.

150. Orly?

151. YaRly

152. Gabriel has always wanted to shout. "THIS. IS. SPARTAAAAA!!!!!"

153. Someone let the Internet in.

154. It's not Marly's Raep closet, it's the Yaoi closet.

155. Who's house is this set in, anyway?

156. Apparently Sephiroth's.

157. That explains all the Kinky stuff.

158. Handcuffs sex is awesome sex.

159. We all know what Kadaj's mouth is good for.

160. Gabriel could make a fortune off that Video with the clones on it.

[Yazoo]

160. Matt has quite the knowledge of the unclean.

161. Not to say that others in the house don't.

162. Handcuffs make an interesting accessory

163. Tseng is a closet Sadist.

163. Still, No one Believes Cissnei about those harassment charges.

164. The Appearance of 3H!Tifa will cause everyone to stare.

165. Gabe still hits on women, even though he's so not straight.

166. Kadaj will randomly moan off-screen at the most inopportune times.

167. Matt will always place things eloquently (AKA bluntly)

168. Mello is too damn adorable for his own good.

169. Aerith and Cissnei -will- catfight.

170. And she'll deny it, but everyone knows Aerith knows Tseng Liked her.

171. Cocktease.

[Kadaj]

172. It is not possible to blackmail Tseng.

173. Yazoo/Kadaj > Sephiroth/Genesis

174. Fangirls agree.

175. It's Gabriel, NOT Gabbo.

176. Incest is -still- Wincest.

177. IT IS HEAVILY IMPLIED THAT I AM PUNCHING YOU OFFSCREEN

178. It's best to never look in the closet.

179. Cloud still has a hole where Sephiroth stabbed him yesterday.

180. The above statement sounds SO wrong on so many levels.

181. If Kadaj decides to tease too much, Yazoo can and will break out of the handcuffs.

182. "That chick's melons where HUGE, damn!"

183. Yes, Matt needs to learn to speak respectfully about women.

184. Nero is extremely confused.

185. Catfights between two of your love interests are extremely awkward.

185. Tseng totally has paperwork to do right now... a-yup.

186. Marluxia somehow remains manly in spite of the pink.

187. And the flower petals.

188. And the bishounen sparklies.

189. That NOBODY NOTICED, RIGHT? D< *sharpens scythe*

190. Aerith apparently thinks Marluxia is a brat.

191. Marluxia is not amused.

192. Loz finally got the pizza.

193. It's not chocolate flavour.

194. Kadaj will interrupt sex just to make sure that nobody takes HIS pizza.

195. Yazoo is not amused.

196. Mello = leather + chocolate + Matt = best f**king yaoi evar.

197. Aerith is not as innocent as she likes to pretend she is.

198. L can scream all he likes, but he wants it.

199. Gabriel has nicknamed Loz "Muscle-man". ''

200. HOLY SHIT TSENG GAVE OUT??!!

201. The only time Tseng loses his cool is when a CERTAIN TURK decides to jump him.

202. Cissnei seems satisfied, at least.

203. According to her, Tseng "could use a bit more practise".

204. Tseng will use ninja powers to avoid awkward questions.

205. *poof* He's gone.

206. NEVER call Mello scarface. It results in bitchslapping.

207. If they were two women, Gabriel would come right now.

208. We ALL know what's small about Light.

209. Gabriel is incredibly skilled at extracting information from people.

210. They're not interested in Light's lower half.

211. Just his c**k.

212. It's always best not to ask.

213. Light can apparently easily kill you with this pen.

214. Until Gabriel steals it.

215. You can either spill the beans right now, or Gabriel will drag the information out of you.


((Still working on this lot...))

[Gabriel]

216. Touching Light when he's KO'd is L's job only.

217. Gabriel is extremely vengeful when it comes to people stealing his lighter.

218. EXTREMELY.

219. The cake was a lieeeeee.

220. The only drug Light gave L was himself... apparently.

221. I'm sorry, Cissnei is away right now hunting down Slum Whores. Please leave a message after the beep.

222. When both of your uberly hot brothers go missing at the same time, it should be pretty obvious something's going on.

223. Unfortunately, Kadaj is a little slow.

224. And still has a SERIOUS issue with sharing.

225. There needs to be a conservation society for doors.

226. Matt is not a dirty dirty manwhore... unless Mello wants him to be.

227. Kick Light hard enough and he'll forget where his c**k goes.

228. Not that he knew in the first place.

229. It was totally Near who is responsible for "lightisadirtyskank.net"... honest.

230. Light turned L into a perv-- no wait, he was always like that.

231. Matt can do no wrong, except when he's smoking.

232. But smoking makes him look even hotter... ;D

233. Matt is also willing to jump out of the window after his lighter.

234. When Gabriel is pissed off, his shoots shit.

235. Marluxia will show you the power of a REAL Deathgod.

236. You totally didn't see the flower petals and bishounen sparklies, got it? ¬___¬

237. Once you got the target on the run, you don't let up until you got 'em.

238. When bribed with sugary food, L will tell you ANYTHING.

239. If not, a gun to the head usually does the trick.

240. Light needs "buttseckz for dummies".

241. "It's like prostitution, but with a killer."

242. Near can kiss Mello's ass.

243. L is a computer.

244. He's full of pr0n.

245. According to Gabriel, Tseng doesn't do "quickies". Everything has to be absolute PERFECTION with him.

246. ...Not that he knows, or anything.

247. Why be professional when you have the mafia?

248. Did Mello see a third nipple or was he just in total shock?

249. Gabe wants to get into L's pants, it seems.

250. Or he would, if L were wearing any pants.